A Fathers Hope

This past week we attended a homeschool kindergarten graduation for my twins. It is sometimes difficult to accept my kids are quickly growing up. As there names were announced pictures of their school year scrolled across a large screen. This made me think about how much they have learned and how little time we have to impact their young lives. I began to consider my hopes and dreams for my children.

Many dads dream of their kids playing sports at a collegiate or professional level. They want them to graduate from popular universities and become doctors or lawyers. Parents often want to live out their dreams through the lives of their kids. As if to fill the voids from their own failures.

My world view of what I wish for my children has changed dramatically in the past 5 years. I have always wanted them to be happy and successful, but my ideas about success have changed. I learned the best place for them is the center of Gods will. I realize their lives will hold so much more value if they focus on eternal things.

Having 5 daughters I know the day is coming when young men will have interest in them. I will have my shotgun ready and waiting. On a serious note, I see no reason for my young daughters to date. Any courtship should be for the purpose of finding a husband and at 14 years of age they are not ready for marriage. If a boy wants to see my daughter he has one choice which is to come to church. She will be there at least 3 times a week. I pray my girls one day seek and find a husband who loves God more than he loves her. If he puts the Lord first I believe everything else will fall in line. I hope my girls will glorify God in all they do and understand how vital their roles as wife and mother can be.

I have many hopes for my 2 sons. I pray they will take serious their responsibility to lead from the front. They are both fully capable of someday shepherding their families in a Godly manner. I want them to highly value their wife and constantly attempt to improve and grow that relationship. They will hopefully stand in the gaps and be willing to die to protect their kids. I pray they have the staying power which helps them drive through the difficult times and always put family before career and hobbies. To do this they will clearly need a strong foundation consisting of a close daily walk with the Lord.

My expectations are different from the normal of the world. My kids will have to be noticeably different. They will face persecution if they choose to live a Christ-like life. I hope to instill in them persecution is a small price for the privilege of honoring God and having a strong family.

You Were Chosen

Dads it is no accident where you are in life. God knew about your current situation long before you were you. He has a plan for you to lead and left you instruction on how to do it. It is easy to think we are in our current situation by default. You might feel as if you don't make enough money or haven't met the goals you set out to meet by now. A good father realizes he must put his family's needs ahead of himself.

We should display an attitude of thankfulness. While the task can be difficult at times, the rewards are many. Dads should be grateful God allows us the wonderful privilege of guiding our families. The opportunity is there to change lives for generations. What an honor to be a part of that. It is no accident. A clear perspective will show what He has for you. It is all in how a dad views his situation and how his vision lines up with the Lord's design for the family.

Recently I have been blessed to see God honor commitment in my family. It is in the spiritual growth of my wife and children. They seem to move closer to God every day. Fathers have to understand the responsibility lies with us and it is not a burden. The joy of this charge should put a smile on your face. Realize you were chosen to fulfill the role of father and husband. You didn't end up there. You were positioned there to allow God to accomplish great things through you.

Time To Lead

I was reminded of something just the other morning. I was reminded of how our attitude and mood affects others. After hitting snooze several times I finally realized I had a meeting and if I didn't get moving I would be late. The previous night I had been up late for no good reason. Needless to say I was groggy and a bit grouchy. As I reached over I noticed my wife was already up for the day. When I came downstairs she had already made coffee, spent time in prayer, and was reading her Bible. She looked to be revived and ready to face the day. She was excited to see me and before I said the first word I instantly felt better. My spirit was lifted.

Reflecting on that moment made me wonder how many times after a tough day at work I probably deflated the life from my wife and kids. The times when a stressful day kept me from leading and encouraging those who need me most. I think of those times when my children are begging for a little time and all they get from me is "not now, Daddy's busy". There have been days when my body is home, but my mind is still at the office. It is very sobering to step back and think about it.

It is time that us fathers and husbands step up to the plate and focus on what is really important. We are called to lead and we need to do just that. It's time we hold ourselves accountable. We should realize our jobs are just a means to provide for our family. How great would it be if people didn't think of us first as construction workers or office managers, but thought of us as Christians and family leaders? One day we will retire and our companies will keep moving as if we were never there. Maybe we will have a shiny retirement watch. All of this is of no eternal value. I know guys who have totally sold out for their job just for career advancement and when they retire are miserable and begging to go back to work. On the other side of that coin I know strong Christian men whose children are now grown and faithfully serving the Lord. Some of these men I have no idea what their career was because they were not defined by their job. It's time we recognize our role and fulfill it.

At the end of the day we are very blessed to have all we do. We should acknowledge that of whom much is given, much is required. Let us not take lightly that which God has trusted us with. He knows all about our situations and he sets us up for success. It is our responsibility to be obedient to him.

Dad's Needed

What's the greastest job in the world? Is it President of the United States, NFL quarteback, or maybe Krispy Kreme taste tester? Nope, the best job is definitely being a Daddy. It is not even close. I think of the feeling everyday returning from work and being greeted like a celebrity. They don't see all your flaws, they only see, "Daddy!" The overgrown child to climb all over and tell rediculous stories. The one who offers free lawnmower rides and fixes things with loud drills. The one the little girls want to marry and the boys want to grow up and be like. Doesn't matter your occupation, to your kids your the coolest Data Entry Processor of all time. Moms definitely get a raw deal in this equation.

The problem is the current Dad shortage. There are plenty of fathers, and yes there is a difference. So what defines a Dad? Is it biological? I have two adopted children and two foster who I love the same, so it's not that. Maybe it is being a provider. I think that is important, but that alone clearly does not meet all their needs. What about a disciplinarian, teacher, counselor, or mentor? I think it's all these and more. It is someone who shows up again and again and puts the needs of his kids before his desires. Their emotional, physical, and spiritual growth are a priority and take precedence over the golf course and video games.

I clearly have room for improvement as the leader of my family. Us Dads often take for granted the amazing privilege God has given us. Our children should never be considered a burden. They are a blessing, a gift from the Lord. We need to take a stand. It is not about our past failures. You can't unscramble eggs. We only have today foward. Our children and God always deserve our best no matter how small that may be. Time is such a valuable resource that is nonrenewable.