Be Who You Are

There is not a lot of sophistication in our family. I wouldn't know where to place a salad fork if my life depended on it. I do understand the importance of our testimony as Christians. We do need to worry about how we appear to others. Our actions and attitudes affect others. We are pushing people toward Christ or pulling them away. Although, there is a difference between maintaining a proper testimony and trying to appear as someone you are not.

Believers often get caught up in appearance only. It is almost like we want others to think we are super spiritual more than we actually would like to be super spiritual. We know all the right churchy talk and customs, but what are we like on the inside? God is concerned with the inside. The second car I owned was a 1970 VW Bug. I had it painted metallic teal and added new wheels and tires. From the outside it looked as if it just rolled of  the assembly line. The inside was a different story. The original upholstery was in shreds. Once anybody peeked inside they could see the poor condition of the car. The outside was not a clear representation of the inside. Sadly, this is the life of many Christians. We get caught up in outward image and many times  we are in shreds internally.

I think it is important to discuss the affect this has on others. After all, as much as we think we can fool others, who we really are eventually surfaces. It is a pride thing. We worry if others will like me if they know the real me. We should consider who we are positionally with God. We are a big worthless nobody outside of God. I will share a secret with you. So is the dad or mom who you think has the perfect life.  It is a sad misrepresentation to be a fake Christian. This has a horrible effect on a struggling Christian. It makes others feel very inadequate when they buy the false front. When a mom sees another mother go on and on about how perfect her children are, how flawless her marriage is, and how her house is never messy, she likely feels defeated. I don't think we need to air our dirty laundry all over social media, but it would be a big help if others knew they were not the only ones to struggle. As my daughter says, " it's not all rainbows and kittens".

It is not easy to humble ourselves. I am reclusive and it is difficult for me to share my struggles. My life is just a series of messes that my God cleans up daily. So is yours if you are a Christian. Let's just be who we are. That is hard enough on it's own.

The Family

We had the opportunity to hear some great preaching on "the family" tonight. It reinforced some important principles for me. In my opinion, Christians do not focus specifically on God's perfect design for our family. Many of us would agree that our societies are moving further and further away from God. There is an increasing acceptance of sin. Things that were completely unacceptable, even when I was young,  are now deemed appropriate by "the world's" standards. It is more important now than ever that Christians learn, understand, and share absolute truth.

My first thought is to consider what has allowed our great nation to separate so far from God's way. Obviously, Satan desires our communities to drift from The Lord, but what have we done(or failed to do) that allowed this downward spiral in America. It starts in our families. We can blame our sometimes luke-warm churches, but it really starts with the family. After all, it is not our Pastor's responsibility to raise our children in the nurture and admonition of The Lord. He may reinforce, but it starts and finishes in the home. To narrow down even more, it starts with the fathers. It is very unlikely for a home with an absent or backslid father to produce children who end up in the center of God's will. It is difficult enough to live right when both parents work to please God, but subtract the leader who is Biblically charged to lead, and you have a recipe for disaster. Look no further than the failing family. I think there are many reasons fathers fail. Most are rooted in pride and selfishness. The modern dad has to have his time, his hobbies, his career, ect. I have heard someone joke that a man that is a very good golfer is likely lacking in other areas of his life. There is probably much truth in this. I have worked with guys who neglect their family in a heartbeat to work any extra hours or to advance in the workplace. I know others who retired and within a few months they are begging to return to work. As dads, we can sometime try to do right with the wrong motivation. We naturally want to be providers. It is when we stray from God's perfect blueprint that we fail. Alot of fathers sit back and allow the wife to fill their role. We cannot expect God's blessing when we stray from His plan. God's way is the best way.

Secondly, I wonder why we don't identify this as the main problem. We try to fix this root issue in reverse. There are ladies conferences, youth groups, and children's programs. Our wives know how to fellowship with each other. They communicate with one another and build each other up. Our kids go   to a distraction free camp and make countless decisions in obedience to God's will. Only to come home and sadly "get over it" due to a lack of reinforcement in the home.  We focus very little on the fathers. God is clearly capable of anything. He can perform a miracle within any situation and sometimes our homes are already broken. We can't change what has already taken place. We have to bloom where we are right now. For the homes where a father is still present, an awesome responsibility awaits.

Our world is a mess because our families are a mess. Our families are a mess because our fathers are a mess. I can't imagine our country will turn back to God until the designed family leaders humble themselves and fill their prescribed role. We need more preaching on the family. We need Godly men to spend time together for edification and encouragement. Young Christian fathers need to be discipled. The family is important to God and He will honor our commitment to it.